Home Coming………

It feels like decades spent at this goddamn city called Hyderabad.Although it has hardly been four months.It always feels great to escape from this maddening city and breathe fresh air. Moreover spending the puja days at this wretched city is just painful. So decided to make a move to home town.That attraction was too much to ignore.

Had to book tickets two months earlier, else one have no option other than to splurge his entire salary for a return ticket.So the journey was pre planned.Again that same 7:40 pm flight which I had missed earlier(Read: One Night@Airport).So set off for the airport with some extra time in hand,and thus avoiding any unwanted adventures.

The airport of Hyderabad,Rajiv Gandhi International Airport,is certainly one of the best in the country.Obtained the boarding pass early,and went in after Security check.Then the long wait in the lounge for the flight to start boarding.Meanwhile noticed that most of the people seating around are Bengalis.Even the spaghetti tops and the halter necks could not hide the Bengaliness of the babes around.Moreover it felt a lot better to listen people talk in Bengali,as I was bored to hell with Telegu!!!!!

There was a smile in every one’s face , as the plane landed on Kolkata at around 10 in the night.The feeling at that moment can’t be explained.A lady sitting behind me,shouted out of joy,when she saw something written in Bengali, as visible through the small window of the aircraft.Jesus…..she might have come back home after a decade,I guess!!!!!!

After alighting from the plane,I suddenly felt the change in weather.Ya,its that hot,humid weather, but I didn’t mind.While making my way back to home from airport, I saw several pandals and people hopping from one pandal to another to watch partimas(pun intended).I rested myself on the seat,closed my eyes and breathed the air of my homeland.That night I had the most peaceful sleep,which healed the bruises inflicted on me by Hyderabad.

 

So how do you feel to return home?????

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Movies you should watch before you Die!!!!!

We are all mortal beings. Although we crave for immortality,we won’t be.Life is short.We find all means to shorten it further.So why not spice up the few days that we are going to live.The easiest way to do so,is to buy the DVD’s of the five movies which I am going to mention below and watch them over and over again.You will die earlier. Guaranteed.This edition is on Bollywood.I will find some time to take on Hollywood too.Now just feel the fain that I went through watching these movies……

Hello

Well,the movie based on Chetan Bhagat’s famous novel One Night@Call Centre had caught everyone’s fancy.The star cast of Sherman,Sohail,Gul Panag was decent along with Salman and Katrina in the lead.I just couldn’t wait for the movie to start.The hall was partially full.As you know the crowds don’t have much liking for good,sensible stuffs.But,what followed was,yaaawwwwnnnnnn.It was a yawnathon.I regretted every second I wasted in the movie theater.Neither the hot sex scene between Sharman and Gul,neither the lackluster performance of the cast and as for Salman and Katrina,they have roles so short,that you blink and you miss.I got so pissed off that I refrained myself from moving into the cinema hall for a month or to.

James

Thank God that I did,t spend any buck for this one.I actually got the pirated ripped version from a friend of mine.Obviously for Nisha Kothari yaar!!!!!She was new and fresh that time.She caught everyone’s fancy.The movie has got few seductive songs.Otherwise,the movie was just a waste,as like any other RGV movies.I forgot the name of the MAN,with six pack abs and dumb expressions.His role was just to bed Nisha Kothari and beat the goons to pulp.But still enjoy the exclusive video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6sKlxh3m_y0

 

RGV ki AAG

A man who created marvels like Satya,Rangeela,Sarkar series, nowdays most of the time comes of with no brainers.We all have seen Sholay of 70’s.An awesome movies.Only Ramu successfully managed to make a crap of it.It takes some doing.Luckily,I knew that the movie would be a huge flop,from the very first promo and I was not wrong.Big B as Babban,was probably and arguably the most irritating creature.The songs were poor.Nisha Kothari was there just for your eyes only.Ajay Devgan and a new guy as jay and Veeru were ordinary.The script was just horrible.Ramu, please go and see a psychiatric.

Blue

A movie so much hyped,sank without a trace.You won’t want to miss any movie that features Kyle Minogoue ,would you????? Moreover Akki in action,promised that blue would be a edge on the seat stuff.What was the final product?????An overweight Sanjay Dutt,a complete misfit.Akshay not even near his best.Zayed, as usual proved to be a sidekick,just about shrieking every now and then.The only pros about this movie,well its Lara Dutta, in the skimpy clad Bikini…….which made us shout……blueeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Karzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Actually I am not much sure about how many zzzzzzzzzz to append.It won’t make much of a difference,will it?????A decent Aap Ka Suroor, drew handful of audience to the theaters and provided them ample time to zzzzzzzzzzzzz.A Himesh howler,can piss off any living creatures on earth.How can you save yourself from being subjected to one noise to another.I mentioned noise, not songs. Even the veteran Urmila,nor Danny could prevent it from being the worst  movie of the year.With or without caps,Himesh, the actor, sucks!!!!! Please spare the evergreen hits like Karz of Rishi Kapoor and making out crap remakes.

Which Bollywood movie pissed you off most?????

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How to get a Pink Slip!!!!!

Well,nobody wants a pink slip, even in the weirdest of their dreams. Of course unless you are totally pissed off with the job.On the part of the new joiners, everyone wants to put in their very best to impress the manager.They try to be disciplined,well behaved,well dressed and shows good positive attitude.Well thats how things generally shape up.But some people prefers other way,which are generally not considered Safe by Normal people.Well,let me tell you a few great ideas about getting a pink slip fast,

Idea One

Just get yourself a seat beside the manager.He is the ultimate.So if you find a way to piss him off, you will have a greater probability to be chucked out of the company.Be it near or far,the manager always has an eye on everybody.He knows everything.So why not seat near his vicinity and directly let him know about your wrong doings.

Idea Two

Arrive office late.Just as simple as that.On being asked either give lame excuses of being caught up in the traffic or be straightforward and say him,that you got really fatigued after the last night@disco.It worked for few centuries and it will work wonders for your case too.

Idea Three

Sleep in the office.We all love to sleep.No god damn thing can separate us,not even your work.So make yourself comfortable on your seat,and just switch to your virtual world,which might be far more interesting than your goddamn real world.For better and faster action,try to snore.

Idea Four

Watch something objectionable, over the internet.Download objectionable stuffs at high volumes.Use torrent.Put up vulgar wallpapers, and better print them out and display them in your cabin.It will work man.You will achieve freedom in no time.

Idea Five

Wreck havoc in the industry.Make sure that when you leave , you become infamous.i know that IT guys doesn’t get much privileges to access precious internals of their respective company,but you still have few options.Go and piss on your main servers,as they cost few lakhs  or crores and they will go down in no time or better still spread some malicious newly made virus over the organization network.I guess you guys have far more fertile brains,to think of much better creative ideas.

Living a One dimensional life is never an option.Spice up your life.Flout the rules.If your company doesn’t discard you,even if you have committed the crimes stated above,then they need you.Or else enjoy your freedom, a better company awaits you!!!!!

So how do you impress your manager?????

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The Art Of Cooking

Oh!!!Man……Its far more easy to fix bugs in a software than to cook.I realize it now.Back at home,I just restricted myself in devouring the tasty meals cooked by mom.Now you wanna know, why I am saying so.I know that many of you guys are expert cooks,but this post is targeted for noobs.

Hurdle One

The most difficult thing is to decide upon what you actually want to cook.Every possible option that you can think of seems to tough to be tried.Once you think of making delicious chicken curry,then you suddenly realize that its beyond you,or the cost of wasting 1/2 kilos of chicken is not worth experimenting.Then all comes down to good old Maggi.You won’t even mind screwing that up,as it is quite cheap.

Hurdle Two

Then you plan for a source of power.I mean gas oven and stuffs like that.When you have got  a landlord who forbids any such stuffs,then you don’t have any goddamn option but to buy a wretched heater and burn up your money along with your Maggi.But we preferred to burn up money,than to starve to death!!!!!

Hurdle Three

Life wouldn’t have been so tough,had just the food and power source would have been enough to feed ourselves.We need goddamn utensils.Cup,plates,spatula,handi,kadai , bowls,plates…..phew!!!!! These stuffs together proved to be more costly than the power source alone.Even worse,you have to clean them.Back home,our maid servant got thousand bucks for that,but here I get only back strain.

Hurdle Four

Failure.It hurts most.If you thought that you will make a good vegetable curry for yourself,and end up eating raw,burnt up stuffs, you feel so frustrated, that you promise to stop experimenting with food that very moment.

Hurdle Five

It hurts!!!!!Burns and pain is all you receive while cooking you goddamn tasteless food.Amateurs like us have no idea when to pour oil,how to keep a safe distance while putting dried vegetables in the kadai.So if you get careless even for a moment,you are gone!!!!Keep Burnol,it comes handy!!!!!

Well life is not so bad either,but the Maggi,the first and the only food I cooked(actually you don’t have to cook either),tasted awesome,but not better than those cooked by mom.

So whats cooking?????

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Being Single!!!!!

Being single is Hard.This is a universal fact,believe it.This post is not meant for those who have  had a break up in recent past.I guess those people would love to be single,for the rest of their life.Ignore them.Who doesn’t want a partner to splurge on.I won’t mind spending half of my goddamn salary on a decent girl.Ya,I am advertising it.Interested people can apply.I will explain you where you feel the pinch,if you happen to be single,just like me

In workplace

Life is not about structure,union,pointers and goddamn queries.Bug fixing is good,but who will patch up the loneliness of our hearts.So an optimizer searches for a tweak,which will fix up his life.Lets come to the point.There are plenty of damsels all around me,and I could not figure out the best one.When I try to figure out one,I find that she had already figured out her boyfriend,or is engaged.But I enjoy,some girls staring at me in the canteen(ya,these days I look cool),but don’t get the courage to move forward.No,wonder,I hover around the canteen frequently.Sometimes unnecessarily and sometimes just  enjoying the pie!!!!!

In the Malls

Hyderabad is full of malls.Probably some are the best in the country. people don’t mind splurging here. But they are hit,because some stuffs are costly,whereas some are less costly.Forget cheap!!!!!I found some of the most exotic beauties out there.They are show-stoppers!!!!!Don’t know how they find the most weirdest looking people as their boyfriend.Believe me.Just for money!!!!!But I find nice looking couples too,and my heart craves more for a life partner.For the time being, my shopping is all about chasing beauties up and down the elevators.Just kidding !!!!!!

In the movie plexes

Well,who wants to watch a movie,when you find two love birds in front or beside you , getting cozy in the middle of darkness and yawns.Two beautiful lovebirds and their antics will keep you on the edge of the seat.

In the parks

Read love park,for more details.

Bus stops

My heart stops @ Bus stop.With all the models,at their best attire and their stylish gait,knocks the hell outta every single MAN.Although buses here are quiet weired,as you don’t get one in 30 minutes.But its worth the wait.Although their faces remain half covered in the veils,but their eyes kill!!!!!

Hey man,cut the crap,all I need is a girl friend, who would cook for me in free!!!!!!

Just kidding!!!!!Love is life.So Live it…………….

Do you enjoy to be Single?????



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Break the Rules!!!!!

Rules are meant to be broken…… aren’t they??What is the point of following rules, when you can make your life so spicy by breaking them. The fun and satisfaction you get by breaking some rules or treading some forbidden path is incomparable.Well I will state in the following lines,about some methodologies to break the rules.So be ready to be the BAD boy now!!!!!!

Break ’em One

Try to be late in the first day of your school,college or job life.It pays.Believe me man, as I have tried them all successfully.In school, from the very first day, I was late, and I caught the attention of the principal on the very first day.We kept meeting virtually every other day, till I passed out.He loved me a lot,because my excuses for being late were unnatural.I was late on the very first day of my college.I entered in the middle of a class and caught the fancy of many girls.Got a lot of proposals,but rejected all(aye,believe it).I was late in the first day of my office and continue to be late virtually everyday, by nearly an hour.Guess what,the manager’s expectations have increased manifold.Baby,its all about Unnatural talents(read it!!!!!).

Break ’em Two

This one is better.In Hyderabad(ya,the goddamn place where I am surviving),there are no traffic rules.You blink and you are dead.You thought that footpaths are meant for mortal beings,then you are wrong.Here,it is meant for autos and bikes,who makes their way during a traffic jam,through footpath.Moreover the one ways here are just worthless.Cars ply in every possible direction here.So look in every possible direction when crossing the One Way road,thanks to the rule breakers.

Break ’em Three

Arriving office late is so much fun.You don’t have an option if you happen to be a late riser.The adventurous part is when you arrive late and move hideously, to your goddamn cabin,saving yourself from confronting the manager and justifying your habit.Its an hide  and seek game or its more like crossing the border unnoticed.

Break ’em Four

It is serious fun to cause mayhem in your rented room,when your landlord happens to be conservative one.Throwing Jockey(ya the brand of underwear which proclaims that it is the next best thing than naked)from balcony,playing music at high volumes,dancing like insane people,throwing leftover food at neighbors roof,drinking beer and doing all possible nasty stuffs.Jesus!!!!!

Break ’em Five

Writing the blog in the office itself is a great blunder.But I have to do it.I don’t know why.It gives me immense pleasure and relaxation to write all these craps.Although I am endowed with an important project of Bank Of America, but they can wait.

So flunk the rules and enjoy(Till you are sacked!!!!!)

So what have you broken?????…….I mean rules!!!!!!!

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So near yet so far…….

In this post of mine,I am actually going to tell you a strange story of friendship.It is a very personal blog,and I warn you that you may get bored while reading this.Actually it is the feeling that I am penning , err, typing out.The two main protagonists involved are me and Satrajit Mahato.I won’t speak much about myself(you can google out my name to find more), but I will speak about the other protagonist of the story.Yep,Satrajit is a boy from Satragachi,Howrah.The common properties that we share is that both of us are shy and spoiled brats.I met this guy during the second year of my college, but we were mere classmates then.None of us were interested in each other.His stylish apparels was the only object that made me notice him.But destiny had other ideas
and we became unseperable friends.You wanna know how??Then keep reading!!!!!! People become friends over coffee,in library,in toilets,in office,in tuitions,over internet……I mean virtually in every possible place in this goddamn world.But EA Sports Fifa 09 brought us together.Confused??I will tell you how!!!!!Well, “Jab manzil ek ho, to raahein mil hi jaatein hain”.If you ask two fifa crazy men, who are followers of rival clubs(ManU and Barca)to clash on a virtual
field, sparks are bound to fly and it flew.

Be it midnight or early morning,we fought hard.The worst part of it was the pre match conversations on gtalk,which used to charge us up, so much that every match was a do or die situation for us.If I
won,then I drove him nuts,by abusing him(we never used
slangs), and when I lost he drove me crazy with his trademark
“ha ha ha ha ha ” and “goallllllllllsssss” and urging me
learn to play and all other craps.The more we fought, our
friendship just got deeper.

I sacrificed my study for Fifa,he too did the same.I drowsed myself in the virtual world and so did he.Both of us were more interseted in reviewing club formation in college class rather than understanding the internals of a compiler.But our friendship was not just one
dimensional.We enjoyed several moments together,ogled at
beautiful girls together,blundered at gateforum classes
together and the list just ceases to end!!!!!
We have helped each during assignments, sometimes
during semesters.I still remember that how I used to soothe
him during vivas,as he uder to get freaked out.But he gave me
the greatest gift of my life on 24,June,2010.Yes I remember
the exact day!!!!!I was in Satrajit’s house, after a
devastating interview at HSBC bank.Careless by nature,we were
too busy playing Fifa rather than worrying about our future.
Suddenly I was called up for a telephonic interview at late
afternoon.Unfortunately,the moment I was about to start the
telephonic interview,there was a powercut.It was difficult to
continue with the gruelling interview,as it required me to
work out problems on paper. In no time,Satrajit opened up all
the windows and made all possible arrangements, so that I can
continue with the interview.He made the most significant
contribution, by helping me to find an answer of just one
question,which mattered most in terms of selection.Finally,I
got selected, and moved to a goddamn place called Hyderabad
to be a part of an wonderful company,leaving back Fifa and my
dear friend.

We still stay connected over phone.But those days
of fierce competition are over.I lost a competitor,who never
gave up until the 90 minute whistle was blown.He inspired me
and changed my life.recently,I got a great news that Satrajit
has got a job in a government sector at Ahmedabad.He was
homesick for the last few days,didn’t have an option, but to
move to a different land.But for the last few days,I got a
bit more involved in my work, and didn’t call him
up.Yesterday,I bought a Fifa 09 original DVD, just to spice
up our fight more genuinely, but that proved to be an irony.
Today morning I got the following SMS from Satrajit:

“Adieu my frnd…..
Bidding u bye….
Leaving the ground..
Am reaching for d sky..
Parting wid u…..not knowing
when we’ll meet..
But whenever we do..
Don’t forget the tr8
I feel lonely..my heart
cries loud..
Wheneva u think me..hv faith..i’ll find  u in d
crowd.
Tk cr….my dear..

satrajit

Probably the most touching sms that I ever recieved.He lefty
for Ahmedabad today morning,but left behing tons and tons of
goals and memories.Everytime,I double click on the Fifa
icon,I will remember you my friend.Way to go my friend,you
conquered Stadio Olympico,my heart and now go on and rule the
professional world.
So where did you find your buddy?????


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